Life after Delivery

I heard a cute story.  It's probably all over the Internet being forwarded around in emails but I still thought it was cute and had a good point.  Here it is with a few grammar corrections by me:

In a mother's womb were 2 babies.  Yes--twins.

One asked the other: "Do you believe in life after delivery?"  

      The other replied, "why, of course.  There has to be something after delivery.  Maybe we are here to prepare ourselves for what we will be later."  

     "Nonsense," said the other.  "There is no life after delivery.  What would that life be?"  

     "I don't know, but there will be more light than here.  Maybe we will walk with our legs and eat from our mouths."  

     The other said, "That is absurd!  Walking is impossible, and eating with our mouths?  Ridiculous.  The umbilical cord supplies nutrition.  Walking after delivery is to be excluded.  The umbilical cord is too short."  

      "I think there is something and maybe it's different than it is here."  

      The other replied, "No one has ever come back form there.  Delivery is the end of life, and in the after-delivery it is nothing but darkness and anxiety and it takes us nowhere."  

     "Well, I don't know," said the other, "but certainly we will see our mother and she will take care of  us."  

     "Mother??  You believe in mother?  Where is she now?"  

     "She is all around us.  It is in her that we live.  Without her there would not be this world."  

     "I don't see her, so it's only logical that she doesn't exist."  

      To this, the other replied,  "Sometimes when you're in silence you can hear her.  You can perceive her.  I believe there is a reality after delivery and we are here to prepare ourselves for that reality."

Interesting.  Makes me think.

Intimacy Issues

I had an interesting conversation with my bishop last week.  It was about how there isn't much communication in our YW presidency.  I said maybe it was because I don't text.  Then I made and interesting confession--not one that many bishops expect I'm sure.  I said "I just let people think I can't text. It used to be true, but isn't anymore."  I told him it's easier to tell people that I can't than that I won't.

In thinking about it, I've come to some interesting conclusions about myself.  I have intimacy issues.  I don't to text people or receive texts from people who I'm not already sure love me.  Cursory "Whatcha doing?" notes from Keith or "I'll be 20 minutes late" warnings from Lucy or "I forgot my permission slip" requests from Mikey are acceptable because I know that over the dinner table that night we'll have  a real conversation. It isn't our sole means of informing each other of things.  We all have an understanding that face time (Not the computer/phone thing) is important and necessary.

Keith and the kids understand that I keep my phone in my purse and may or may not check it.  They know I'd rather hear their voices.  They are the ones that could call me at 11 pm if they needed and not be rude.
They are the ones who can make expectations on me.  They aren't intruding on my personal life or time. They are my personal life and time.

Like I said I keep my phone in my purse--with my checkbook balance and my tampons.  Acquaintances, coworkers, presidency members--they don't belong in there.  Or in my back pocket.  Or on my night stand. or on my dates with my husband.

When I was living with Keith's parents before we got married, Sherry insisted on doing my laundry--there was a certain day for clothes and one for sheets.  I hated that.  Laundry is intimate to me.  Nobody washes my clothes but me.  When we lost Ian, a sister in my word (who cleans houses) wanted to come by and clean my bathrooms.  I think she was offended when I refused.  Again, intimate.  So I guess I have weird boundaries.  I keep this blog pretty private--with my phone, my laundry and my bathroom.

That said, the few people that have this blog address are also in my inner circle and can text me anytime.

I Miss Ian

Just looking at old photos today and this one made me happy and sad!  A little more sad than happy.

God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob

I've been thinking about Abraham for weeks--yes, Abraham in the Bible.  We were taught and reminded of his story several weeks ago in Sunday School and heard about it again in general conference last weekend. I've been stuck on it and the interpretations of it and finally came to a conclusion that makes sense to me. Here are excerpts  from the book of Abraham in the Pearl of Great Price with the picture:

 12 And it came to pass that the priests laid violence upon me, that they might slay me also, as they did those virgins upon this altar; and that you may have a knowledge of this altar, I will refer you to the representation at the commencement of this record.
 13 It was made after the form of a bedstead, such as was had among the Chaldeans, and it stood before the gods of Elkenah, Libnah, Mahmackrah, Korash, and also a god like unto that of Pharaoh, king of Egypt.
 14 That you may have an understanding of these gods, I have given you the fashion of them in the figures at the beginning, which manner of figures is called by the Chaldeans Rahleenos, which signifies hieroglyphics.
 15 And as they lifted up their hands upon me, that they might offer me up and take away my life, behold, I lifted up my voice unto the Lord my God, and the Lord hearkened and heard, and he filled me with the vision of the Almighty, and the angel of his presence stood by me, and immediately unloosed my bands;
 16 And his voice was unto me: Abraham, Abraham, behold, my name is Jehovah, and I have heard thee, and have come down to deliver thee, and to take thee away from thy father’s house, and from all thy kinsfolk, into a strange land which thou knowest not of;
 17 And this because they have turned their hearts away from me, to worship the god of Elkenah, and the god of Libnah, and the god of Mahmackrah, and the god of Korash, and the god of Pharaoh, king of Egypt; therefore I have come down to visit them, and to destroy him who hath lifted up his hand against thee, Abraham, my son, to take away thy life.
 18 Behold, I will lead thee by my hand, and I will take thee, to put upon thee my name, even the Priesthood of thy father, and my power shall be over thee.
 19 As it was with Noah so shall it be with thee; but through thy ministry my name shall be known in the earth forever, for I am thy God.

It doesn't sound like anything a person would ever forget.  The memory of it would be embedded in the mind forever.  "I was on an altar, ready to be killed and God saved me."

Fast forward to his experience with Isaac:

 1 And it came to pass after these things, that God did tempt Abraham, and said unto him, Abraham: and he said, Behold, here I am.
 2 And he said, Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.
 3 And Abraham rose up early in the morning, and saddled his ass, and took two of his young men with him, and Isaac his son, and clave the wood for the burnt offering, and rose up, and went unto the place of which God had told him.
 4 Then on the third day Abraham lifted up his eyes, and saw the place afar off.
 5 And Abraham said unto his young men, Abide ye here with the ass; and I and the lad will go yonder and worship, and come again to you.
 6 And Abraham took the wood of the burnt offering, and laid it upon Isaac his son; and he took the fire in his hand, and a knife; and they went both of them together.
 7 And Isaac spake unto Abraham his father, and said, My father: and he said, Here am I, my son. And he said, Behold the fire and the wood: but where is the lamb for a burnt offering?
 8 And Abraham said, My son, God will provide himself a lamb for a burnt offering: so they went both of them together.
 9 And they came to the place which God had told him of; and Abraham built an altar there, and laid the wood in order, and bound Isaac his son, and laid him on the altar upon the wood.
 10 And Abraham stretched forth his hand, and took the knife to slay his son.
 11 And the angel of the Lord called unto him out of heaven, and said, Abraham, Abraham: and he said, Here am I.
 12 And he said, Lay not thine hand upon the lad, neither do thou any thing unto him: for now I know that thou fearest God, seeing thou hast not withheld thy son, thine only son from me.
 13 And Abraham lifted up his eyes, and looked, and behold behind him a ram caught in a thicket by his horns: and Abraham went and took the ram, and offered him up for a burnt offering in the stead of his son.
 14 And Abraham called the name of that place Jehovah-jireh: as it is said to this day, In the mount of the Lord it shall be seen.
 15 And the angel of the Lord called unto Abraham out of heaven the second time,
 16 And said, By myself have I sworn, saith the Lord, for because thou hast done this thing, and hast not withheld thy son, thine only son:
 17 That in blessing I will bless thee, and in multiplying I will multiply thy seed as the stars of the heaven, and as the sand which is upon the sea shore; and thy seed shall possess the gate of his enemies;
 18 And in thy seed shall all the nations of the earth be blessed; because thou hast obeyed my voice.

Here are Elder L. Tom Perry's words about it from last week:

Abraham’s faith was tested in a way that many of us would consider unimaginable.
I have contemplated on many occasions the story of Abraham and Isaac, and I still do not believe I fully comprehend Abraham’s faithfulness and obedience. Perhaps I can imagine him faithfully packing up to leave early one morning, but how did he take all those steps alongside his son Isaac over the three-day journey to the base of Mount Moriah? How did they carry the wood for the fire up the mountain? How did he build the altar? How did he bind Isaac and lay him on the altar? How did he explain to him that he would be the sacrifice? And how did he have the strength to lift the knife to slay his son? Abraham’s faith empowered him to follow God’s lead with exactness up until the miraculous moment when an angel called out from heaven, announcing to Abraham that he had passed his agonizing test. And then the angel of the Lord repeated the promise of the Abrahamic covenant.

I think the way he did all that was that he was uniquely qualified as perhaps the only person on the earth who had ever survived the experience.  He knew that God could step in at the last possible second and save his son in exactly the same manner that He had saved him.  That's what he had to be thinking the whole time.

President Harold B. Lee is credited with the much quoted line of "whom the Lord calls, the Lord qualifies." Abraham was qualified. Heavenly Father wasn't torturing Abraham; He was testing him and because of his past experiences and real visitations, he was prepared (at least on some level) to handle  a test of this magnitude.
We, like the Savior learn obedience through the things that we suffer. Absolutely, Abraham suffered.  But, I think he was prepared.  He was given an extraordinary knowledge that God can and does step in.
I also believe that Isaac had heard the story of his father being 'almost sacrificed' as many times as every child has heard their father's best story.  He was aware.  He didn't follow foolishly without asking any questions.  They probably had the warmest, most loving, honest time  they had ever had together on that trip.
And what about Isaac's faith and obedience and trust and fear and submission--"even as a child doth submit to his father."  He's probably the reference for that line of later scripture.

Lastly, I think Sarah knew what was going on too.  That's why she was gone when they got back.  She had the faith and knew her husband would be obedient, but she didn't couldn't muster the physical strength to wait for the outcome.  She probably died of a broken heart hoping both her husband and son would return.

Prom

That's my girl.
At the Country Club.
With a pedicure and glittery sandals.
She even got her hair done at a salon.--You can do that when you find a great dress for $16.00.  Yes new--no thrifting for prom.
Glad her motto is "modest is hottest."  I don't have to worry about the shrug coming off during the night.

Right now as I write this she's at a pool party with boys and girls.  Yikes.  I had to ask whose parents would be there and if she had made sure there would be no alcohol and admonish her that while she was in her suit and wet there was no touching a boyfriend.  Parenting keeps getting harder.  As much as I hate her growing up--I know it beats the alternative.  I want her to enjoy life--be good, but be happy.  I have to keep lengthening the leash.

Strong Witnesses for the Savior

I watched general conference today.  And yesterday.  It was good.  Really good.  I have highlights.

More than 1 apostle gave a talk that sounded like Elder McConkie's last testimony.  Very, very strongly worded witnesses.  I hope they will not be their last words to us.

Gratitude is not about what we have--not even the blessings we have.  It's an attitude of faith.  We don't have to wait for everything to turn out right to be thankful.  I was thinking about it tonight, about what God really wants from us and I think it is what I want from my children.  I want them to show me they love me by doing what I ask of them.  I want them to acknowledge me when they succeed--not credit me or praise me, just remember me.  That's what God wants isn't it?

I am a pick-up truck carrying a load.  The load I carry helps me get back to my Heavenly Father.  Yes, this was a story in a talk--I guess you had to be there.  Maybe I'll link it sometime.  I'll have to read it over and over to understand it fully because I think it meant that some loads and good and some aren't.  Getting strength from carrying a load is good--unless it's sin.  Challenges can be strengthening but I'd rather my truck never got stuck and needed weight in the back.  The one thing I did think of this talk was some loads are a lode.  A treasure.  Precious in what they teach, but still a burden.  It's a good thing Christ has a yoke that's stronger than four wheel drive.

Mikey learned that getting a ride with a stranger can be a good thing.  Oops.  That was a really good talk. I can't remember the over-arching subject but it was really good. In fact, I was really impressed with both of the sisters' talks this time.  I know how sexist I am when it comes to conference, but this time I was happily surprised.  Both great talks.  One on pornography.  Guess that means it's now a problem women have too.  Yikes.

Elder Scott stills loves his wife Jeanene.  His devotion and love for her is a treasure and I say that without any of my usual sarcasm.  I mean it.  She is still part of his life and that makes me smile.
If there was one topic that was repeated more than others, I would say it was to the youth--Be strong and don't be afraid of standing alone.  Hmm--how did the general authorities get a hold of my last post?